The little things that make me love you...or not.

October 08, 2010

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It’s the little things that make or break relationships. I was in a relationship, long long ago in a galaxy far far away. Seriously, before my husband, I dated a guy who was great. He was an all around friend to everyone, he knew how to have fun but be responsible, and he even charmed my friends and parents with his banter and wit. But…there were these little things he DIDN’T do that caused me to leave him.

One example is he never opened the door for me, car or building. I’m a southern girl, he is a southern boy, opening the door is a form of flattery that I revel in. Another example, every birthday, anniversary or Valentine’s it was the same dozen red roses, from the supermarket, despite the fact I repeatedly told him my favorite flowers were hydrangeas. (FYI...I’m not the subtle type, I’m pretty straight forward.) These are two of many examples of little things that were overlooked. Alone, they are petty worthless preferences but added together, their sum equaled him losing me.

As I revise my novel I realize I’m pretty picky. Yes, sometimes I overanalyze to the point of stifling myself. But I find as I keep moving forward, I sort out the little things. Things that individually would not cause an agent to reject my book but if you add all those little things up, I will surely end up in the slush pile.

6 comments

Stina LindenblattOctober 8, 2010 at 7:02 AM
I think it's great you're like that. That makes you a great editor (and no doubt crit partner, too). :D
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Catherine DentonOctober 8, 2010 at 8:30 AM
Good reminder. I sometimes skim past the little things hoping no one will notice (even though my conscience prickles). You've just reminded me WHY it's important. Don't want to be stuck in slush.
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Dana ElmendorfOctober 8, 2010 at 4:28 PM
Sometimes Stina it's a pain but I'm crossing my fingers it pays off in the end. I wonder if my crit partner tires of my details? SHe says she loves me :)

Catherine, yes as eager as I am to send it this off, I know it would be tossed to the side like a candy wrapper.
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Diana PazOctober 11, 2010 at 10:40 AM
Stina you're right, it makes her an EXCELLENT critique partner.

I DON'T tire of your details! I always-always-always love them. And I do love you :)

*Di marks down hydrangeas as Dana's flower of choice*
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Laura MarcellaOctober 15, 2010 at 7:23 AM
It's great to be picky for some things, like who you're going to spend the rest of your life with and when you're writing a novel with the hopes of publication! It's important to get it right so being picky is beneficial! Notice I didn't say perfect; no matter how hard we try, nothing is ever truly perfect since perfection is subjective!
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Amalia T.October 20, 2010 at 7:03 AM
The little things are so important! They can make a work SING! Just like the little things can bring us huge amounts of joy--they'll do the same for a manuscript!

Also, there is nothing wrong with being a little bit picky :)
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