2/24/11

Feel it in My Bones

You know that feeling of confidence, that no matter what anyone says, they can’t shake you. You just feel it so strongly, right down to your bones.  That’s how I feel about this manuscript. 

Yes, every manuscript a writer always feels “this is the one.”  And yes, I’m saying it for the fourth time now.  But the difference is, the first three I “hoped” this was the one.  Now I know it.

How, do you ask? 

The simple answer, you just know.  But it’s not a simple answer.  It’s complicated on all kinds of levels.  You don’t want the simple answer, now do you.  Fine, let me see if I can unravel it for you.  I wrote this baby uninhibited.  No over thinking.  No preconceived notions.  Just pure straight, set my perfectionist meddlesome habits to the side and wrote.  Secondly, when I got to a thick spot that felt like cold molasses under my feet, I kept walking and allowed myself to write the crap. 

Along the way my confidence on the piece has grown.  Each step I have felt more secure.  (Unlike my other pieces where I faked it until I made it.)  Now that I am in the editing stage, my confidence is tenfold.  Sure, there are all kinds of plot holes, useless plot threads, areas of weak voice and a whole bunch of what-the-heck-am-I-trying-to-say spots but I see them coming a mile away.  Unlike previous manuscripts where I had no idea what was wrong with it. (Couldn’t see the forest for the trees syndrome.)

I am very well aware that admitting my confidence in this manuscript has probably sealed its fate as permanently unpublished.  But I really don’t believe that or care.  
I’ll be done in a month or so.
I’ll query it.  
And I’ll let you know how that works out for me.

(Psst.  Is it just me or can you hear my twang in this post?)
Image Source: Free from Stock.xchng.

8 comments :

  1. This makes me happy for two reasons.

    1. It shows how much you've grown as a writer that you can recognize in your own work just how good it is. How many words did it take you to reach that point? I'm guessing a lot. And a lot of times questioning whether you were wasting your time or not. I've heard it said that it takes four novels to write a good one, so it looks like you're right on track. Keep going and get it out there.

    2. Based on your previous post about snowboarding, I expected Feel it in My Bones" to be literal. Glad you made it safely off the slopes.

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  2. Yay! What a good feeling, can you put some of that in a box and ship to me via overnight UPS?! Ok, Thanks!

    No seriously, that is awesome!!

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  3. That's so awesome!! I get the same feeling from my mss--every time I did anything with it I walked away feeling like it was even more awesome and THIS IS THE ONE.

    And I think there is no reason saying it means it will be doomed to unpublished-ville! Saying it should only make you and the mss stronger :D

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  4. I need some of your exuberance to rub off on me. I've been all over the place, emotionally, about my writing lately.

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  5. You go girl!!!!!!!! I think I heard a little twang. ;)My Blog

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  6. Matt – You hit the nail on the head. That is exactly how I feel. I’ve grown far enough in my writing that I know what’s good, and what sucks. There is no suckage here. Snowboarding was a blast. Maybe next time I will graduate off the bunny slopes. Ahhh! Seriously. I’m a tough girl but me snowboarding, not so tough.

    Nicole – Yeah, I ship that and the three cans of disinfectant I owe you. Me and my MS, we in a good place.

    Amalia – Don’t it feel grand? I like the way you think, saying it doesn’t make it doomed but makes it stronger.

    Karen – Girl….did my email the other day not lift you up enough. Do I need to gush some more? Because what you got going on *does the finger wand over her* is GOOOOOD. Trust me. I see it. But I feel you, I’ve been emotional about a piece before and it’s not fun.

    Catherine – Yeah baby. I’m a twanging today for sure. Go figure. It must be these race car romance novels Nicole has me reading.

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  7. That's awesome! Good luck with the rest of the editing and then querying. :)

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  8. I know the feeling. I thought I felt it with the last MS, but then I know the feeling is stronger than ever before with the current project.

    Happy writing.

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